Sunday, July 26, 2015

Waiting for Mark-Jerzy

Two due dates have come and gone and still we wait.  Mama's health looks good and baby is growing.  

This is the first time that we have decided to find out if our baby is a boy or girl.  The kids have started to take bets on the gender of the latest sibling to come along and we just all had a feeling that he was a boy.  For the last 5 babies we have also waited until after they were born to name them.  There are always lots of debates among the children of what they want to name the baby, but ultimately daddy always says, "this is mom and dad's baby and we get to decide".   But it is always a mixture of what we all decide as a family.  The kids waited awhile to bring up the name Mark Jerzy to dad because he has never wanted to name one of his boys after himself.  The kids also wanted the name of Jerzy (and a few other names were debated about).  Jerzy is the polish name for Jerry (well technically George) of which is Mark's father's name but also it is the name of a polish priest who was martyred during the time of Communism in Poland.   Jerzy Poielusko  The kids have won out and the baby's name will by Mark-Jerzy, but the debate is still going on if we will hyphenate it and add a third name.

We have had a lot of time to reflect and to learn.  Learning about trisomy babies has opened our eyes to a whole new world.  There are so many beautiful stories of families who have chosen to carry their baby to term despite the term "lethal syndrome" is told to them.  We've learned that one reason for the 20 week US is to check to see if the baby has any abnormalities so the parents have plenty of time to chose to abort before the third trimester.  Of babies who are diagnosed with t13 or t18, 90% are aborted in Europe and 75% are aborted here in the states.  What a fulfilled prophecy, lethal syndrome indeed.  Of those babies who survive 50% will die before birth.  Of those babies who survive to birth many more die with only 10% make it to their first birthdays.  However, many parents are not told at the time of birth that they can feed their baby, or that the baby may just need a little oxygen. The thought is these babies are not going to live anyway, so why treat them.  Now we are not even talking about extra measures like tracheotomy, or life-support.  We are talking about giving a new born baby milk instead of sucrose and water.  When they have an apnea episode sometimes that is all they need is a little oxygen.  Thankfully that mindset is changing as more t13 and t18 babies are surviving and living and the families admit that they would do it all over again to have that special child in their family.  Here is a website with more information about trisomy.

Mark-Jerzy has too many problems however, the hole in his diaphragm being one.  With that we are not sure he will even be able to take is first breath.  We are still praying for our little one, but we know that death is not our enemy.  We are so thankful for the life of this little one and if we must say goodbye as soon as we say hello, the thought wrenches our heart,  we trust in the goodness of our Father and we are so thankful for the hope of heaven.

The reading from the Office of Readings last Friday the 24th spoke to us both: 2 Corinthians 5:1 -10

his foot in 3D
We know that when the tent that we live in on earth is folded up, there is a house built by God for us, an everlasting home not made by human hands, in the heavens. In this present state, it is true, we groan as we wait with longing to put on our heavenly home over the other; we should like to be found wearing clothes and not without them. Yes, we groan and find it a burden being still in this tent, not that we want to strip it off, but to put the second garment over it and to have what must die taken up into life. 
This is the purpose for which God made us, and he has given us the pledge of the Spirit.
We are always full of confidence, then, when we remember that to live in the body means to be exiled from the Lord, going as we do by faith and not by sight – we are full of confidence, I say, and actually want to be exiled from the body and make our home with the Lord. Whether we are living in the body or exiled from it, we are intent on pleasing him. For all the truth about us will be brought out in the law court of Christ, and each of us will get what he deserves for the things he did in the body, good or bad.

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