Two due dates have come and gone and still we wait. Mama's health looks good and baby is growing.
This is the first time that we have decided to find out if our baby is a boy or girl. The kids have started to take bets on the gender of the latest sibling to come along and we just all had a feeling that he was a boy. For the last 5 babies we have also waited until after they were born to name them. There are always lots of debates among the children of what they want to name the baby, but ultimately daddy always says, "this is mom and dad's baby and we get to decide". But it is always a mixture of what we all decide as a family. The kids waited awhile to bring up the name Mark Jerzy to dad because he has never wanted to name one of his boys after himself. The kids also wanted the name of Jerzy (and a few other names were debated about). Jerzy is the polish name for Jerry (well technically George) of which is Mark's father's name but also it is the name of a polish priest who was martyred during the time of Communism in Poland. Jerzy Poielusko The kids have won out and the baby's name will by Mark-Jerzy, but the debate is still going on if we will hyphenate it and add a third name.
We have had a lot of time to reflect and to learn. Learning about trisomy babies has opened our eyes to a whole new world. There are so many beautiful stories of families who have chosen to carry their baby to term despite the term "lethal syndrome" is told to them. We've learned that one reason for the 20 week US is to check to see if the baby has any abnormalities so the parents have plenty of time to chose to abort before the third trimester. Of babies who are diagnosed with t13 or t18, 90% are aborted in Europe and 75% are aborted here in the states. What a fulfilled prophecy, lethal syndrome indeed. Of those babies who survive 50% will die before birth. Of those babies who survive to birth many more die with only 10% make it to their first birthdays. However, many parents are not told at the time of birth that they can feed their baby, or that the baby may just need a little oxygen. The thought is these babies are not going to live anyway, so why treat them. Now we are not even talking about extra measures like tracheotomy, or life-support. We are talking about giving a new born baby milk instead of sucrose and water. When they have an apnea episode sometimes that is all they need is a little oxygen. Thankfully that mindset is changing as more t13 and t18 babies are surviving and living and the families admit that they would do it all over again to have that special child in their family. Here is a website with more information about trisomy.
The reading from the Office of Readings last Friday the 24th spoke to us both: 2 Corinthians 5:1 -10